The Burger King God: Have it Your Way

Some of you reading this are struggling with allowing Jesus Christ to shine through you. You struggle with the perception of others. You are afraid to be a Godly man or woman. You acknowledge God’s omnipotence, but don’t think you are called to actually do anything. Which means, you also don’t really live as though you truly believe God is who He says He is.

I’ve read about this term called “Practical Atheism.” Craig Groeschel, Senior Pastor at LifeChurch in Oklahoma, describes the term this way: “It’s when you say, ‘I believe in God, I just don’t fear Him.’”

This is where the rubber meets the road. Beth Moore, the great author and speaker, calls this the difference between “Believing IN God, and believing God.” Most people do believe IN God. However, they don’t claim God’s promises unless they are convenient, or until they are urgent.

According to the writer in Proverbs, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline.” (Proverbs 1:7 NIV)

We want to be able to reap the rewards of Christianity without actually obeying Christ. Because many lack the discipline to be obedient to God’s commands, they begin to create their own theology – one that is not rooted in God Himself, but rather in their own concoction of a little bit of God, and a whole lot of themselves.

I read an eye-opening article entitled More Americans Tailoring Religion to Fit Their Needs that appeared in USA Today. Here’s an excerpt from the article, written by Cathy Lynn Grossman:

The folks who make up God as they go are side-by-side with self-proclaimed believers who claim the Christian label but shed their ties to traditional beliefs and practices. Religion statistics expert George Barna says, with a wry hint of exaggeration, America is headed for "310 million people with 310 million religions."

And, while each of us may commune with God in our own way, scripture is absolutely clear that there’s only ONE way to heaven, and that is through Jesus Christ. Not through what “feels” right. Not through “being a good person.” Not through “taking care of Mother Earth” or through self-improvement, or enlightenment.

Among Jesus’ many profound teachings are bold statements he made to the crowds who followed him. They are referred to as “I AM” statements:

I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never go thirsty. (John 6:35)

I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life. (John 8:12)

I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved. (John 10:9)

I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. (John 11:25-26)

I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. (John 14:6)

I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me, and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. (John 15:5)

In that same USA Today article, Barna laments, "People say, 'I believe in God. I believe the Bible is a good book. And then I believe whatever I want.'"

In the end, you either you believe God (Jesus), or you don’t. John, the disciple who may have been Jesus’ closest friend, wrote this near the end of his life:

We know that we have come to know him if we keep his commands. Whoever says, “I know him,” but does not do what he commands is a liar, and the truth is not in that person. But if anyone obeys his word, love for God is truly made complete in them. This is how we know we are in him: Whoever claims to live in him must live as Jesus did. (1 John 2:3-6)

So, here’s our call: To believe God, accept Christ, and do as he did – obeying his Father, and loving and serving others.

Church and Halloween

Let me preface this by saying that the opinions I share in this post are generalizations about churches - not anything personally directed at you or your church. I am a pastor at a church. I LOVE the church, and would never want to say anything do it harm. But, I do think it's OK to challenge people's thinking.

Each Halloween, I get a little bit agitated. Don't get me wrong - I love the frivolity of the costumes, the spookiness of the season (not REAL spookiness, mind you), and of course the booty of candy my kids bring in that night (plus any leftovers the in-laws may have). No, my ire has nothing to do with Halloween itself. It's many churches' approach to Halloween that raises my blood pressure.

Like you, I drive by countless churches during the month of October with signs, banners, and LED boards with these three words: Trunk or Treat. Clever.

But, this idea has evolved over the decades. When I was growing up, my school always held a Fall Festival. There were games, crafts, costumes, dunk tanks, apple bobbing, and lots of good food. The church - lacking in creativity - adopted this idea and began holding their own Fall Festivals. Same idea, but just lots of church people, with lots of church fundraisers mixed in.

In general, when it came to Halloween, the church has been against it. The Fall Festival was, in theory, a way to get people together to celebrate the autumn season, while in no way acknowledging Halloween. One online resource I read says, "the term was created to replace the traditional Halloween party because of fundamentalist rhetoric that Halloween is a satanic holiday. It is not a satanic holiday, by the way. It is a celebration of the autumn equinox which has been celebrated by Christians for many centuries, and by pagans for many centuries before that."

Here's how I believe churches evolved the idea from Fall Festival to "Trunk or Treat." Churches that offered a Fall Festival noticed that their congregants were still being drawn into the secular world of All Hallow's Eve. Families who attended a Fall Festival on October 25 were still going trick-or-treating on October 31. Churches thought they would "wise up" and offer something which would force families to choose between their ultra-safe, insider-focused church event and trick-or-treating, which involves families being around - oh my word - people who don't go to church. The horrors!

So, the church, once again incredible in its ingenuity, came up with the term "Trunk or Treat" to make sure we all knew that it was staking its claim on this "holiday." They said, "We'll still allow kids to wear costumes, we'll hand out candy, and we'll replace those wacky tricks people play on one another with sitting in the trunk of your car (or tailgate of your truck). In doing this, churches who have a Trunk or Treat have communicated to their congregants, "We don't have a problem with Halloween or with trick-or-treating. We just don't want you doing it with your un-churched friends in your neighborhoods."

Do I believe all churches who hold a Trunk or Treat think this way? Certainly not. But, I do think these churches need to really think through the real reasons they are holding the event. If it's for safety, I'd say, "When is the last time any you know actually got a razor blade in an apple, or were poisoned by candy?"

Most churches already have the reputation for being too insider-focused. They consider reaching their community holding a Trunk or Treat or Vacation Bible School. Instead, I believe churches need to be looking for more opportunities to serve others outside their walls, and empowering their people to influence others - even through trick-or-treating with their families.

BTW - I pulled the Trunk or Treat image above off a church website.

First Impressions

You’ve seen them. Some wear headphones and dance. Some wear costumes – maybe a Mickey Rat, or a faux Easter Bunny, or Lady Liberty. Still others just chill in a tailgating chair, or perhaps just pace back and forth. Who are they? They’re the “sign holders.” Pizza places, chicken finger restaurants, tax preparers, or used car lots employ them. They are the hired guns. They are on the front lines.

But, here’s the deal. When I see a business whose primary marketing strategy is to throw a dude carrying a sign out on the road – costume or not – I almost always discard that business from consideration for my hard-earned dollars. To me, it conveys several messages to the consumer. First, it tells me that you are trying to take shortcuts in your advertising plan. Second, it tells me that you have not established a rapport with the community. Businesses are typically built on relationships, not on the sign-holder. When you are putting the sign holder out on the street, you are telling me that you are too lazy to build relationships.

Finally, it comes across to me as desperate. Perhaps a business has attempted to “microwave” relationships with those in the community, and word-of-mouth just isn’t spreading like they had hoped. The balloons and jumpies and weird wavy inflatable stick thingies haven’t drawn the anticipated crowd. So, the owner finally caves and says, “Let’s hire a sign guy.” It’s the last straw many times.

For all of these reasons, I don’t typically patronize these businesses. If people aren’t talking about it, then it’s probably not a place I am going to check out. And, really, if you are a business owner, do you want the VERY FIRST impression of your business to be the dude sitting in the lawn chair with an upside-down sign sitting in his lap?

Despite the public perception (or just mine), I sincerely doubt that business owners want the public to feel this way about their establishments. They fail to realize that they are, in fact, creating a brand image for their product – a negative one in many cases. The message that their target audience is receiving isn’t likely the one they had intended. But, as many have said before, perception is reality many times.

The same happens with us as individuals. We send messages to those around us each and every day – whether we realize it or not. And, while you may say to yourself, “I don’t care what people think about me,” I believe you need to. Admit it or not, we need people to like us in order for us to thrive. You may be able to get away with being a self-absorbed prima donna for a while, and fool people into believing that you are just “eccentric” or “unique.” But, that will only take you so far.

If you are an artist, a teacher, a musician, a contractor, a homemaker, or a banker, people are forming impressions of you all the time. They base this on the “signs” that you put on display every day: your attitude, your demeanor, your tone of voice, your word choice. And, yes, your appearance! Greasy hair, clothing that is too revealing, clothing that is too baggy, tattoos, piercings – people notice these things and form opinions. You cannot escape it. On the other hand, people also form opinions about people who wear a suit and tie, khaki shorts, flip-flops, or a certain brand of tennis shoe. We all have our own "personal style."

Am I saying to be a “sell-out” to please others? No. But, I am saying that in order to get where we need to be, or want to be, we should consider others – because we do need others in our lives.

Despite the moniker, there’s really no such thing as the “self-made man.” Each of us has built a “brand” for ourselves over time. These are impressions that others have of us before they ever even interact with us. For example, we may have never owned or driven a Ferrari, but we each have thoughts and feelings about that brand. Likewise, based on what people witness in you, they draw conclusions about the brand you “wear” each day. The question is – Is this the message you intended to send?

Embrace the Challenge

Crossword Puzzles. Jigsaw Puzzles. Tying your shoes for the first time. Sports. TV Game Shows. Running a Marathon. Earning a certification for your vocation or career. Solving Rubik’s Cube.

All of these have something in common. They present challenges. At least they should. That’s the reason we attempt them, right? If no challenge was involved, would we even try? OK, maybe “tying your shoes” can be eliminated here, but if you ever watch a four or five-year old tying their shoes, you can’t help but get tickled by the focus and concentration painted on their little faces.

So, if things like game shows, puzzles, and sports keep us interested and enthusiastic about them because of the competition involved, and inner strength required to reach great heights, why do we not approach life the same way?

Sometimes I get into this mode where I just want things to go smoothly. It’s called “being human.” It basically happens every day. Smooth days are nice. Bumpy – not so much. But, if life is always smooth, and I never encounter adversity in my path, am I truly reaching my God-given potential? If I am not pushed relationally, emotionally, spiritually, or intellectually, I am settling. And, perhaps worse than that, I could be regressing.

Think about the most difficult path you’ve walked in your life. When you look in the rearview mirror of your years on earth, did that event or trial strengthen you, or did it weaken you? I’m not necessarily talking about death of a loved one, or sickness or some other devastating event. I am talking about those times you had to dig deep, work hard, and give it your all. In hindsight, were you glad you gave 100%, or was it a complete waste of time?

Occasionally, it’s nice to receive a hand-out. As a baseball coach, it’s a relief sometimes to not toil over who to pitch in the last inning, or who to put behind the plate when it’s 95 degrees outside. But, the most rewarding “wins” are the ones where everyone is putting it all on the line, and you eek out that one-run victory on a bases-clearing double. Those are the ones you celebrate the most. But it’s not the hit itself that wins the game. It’s the attitude the hitter has in the box.

In his book, If You Want to Walk on Water, You’ve Got to Get Out of the Boat, John Ortberg talks quite a bit about those things that hold us back from achieving our best. It’s the “what if” moments that cause discouragement to creep in. Ultimately, it’s a lack of confidence that creates something that destroys the joy in our lives: fear.

So, if fear destroys joy, then (as Ortberg writes) “challenge produces joy.” The payoff for the base hit isn’t just the “W” in the victory column; it’s the joy you get from meeting – and overcoming – the challenge. If our baseball team was undefeated, and had won each game by ten or more runs, we’d be over-confident. We wouldn’t know exactly what our best truly is. We wouldn’t aspire to become better. We’d go through the motions and settle for “good” when “best” is there for the taking.

And so it is with our lives. We trudge through our days, going to work, paying the bills, getting the kids ready, talking about the weather, lamenting about this and that. Generally speaking, we have what we “want” – a nice house, two cars (or more), some gadgets and gizmos, a decent job, and a few friends.

What we fail to realize is that if we will challenge ourselves – really push ourselves – we can reach new heights. We can accomplish great things and influence countless lives. But, all too often we are complacent about “the unknown.” And, if we’re not complacent, we’re just plain scared. But, as I tell my players, “You can’t play scared.”

Ortberg writes that “fear and joy are fundamentally incompatible.” When I wonder “what if” and think about all the worst-case scenarios, I am snuffing out joy.

And, who wants to be a joy-snuffer?

First Things First

There are two words that have been burned into my brain. It started when I began dating my now-wife Amy. Her dad, David, always used these two words when he would speak to her and her two brothers. Every so often, he would utter this simple phrase that painted a picture of his expectations of his family, and of others in general: “Privileges and Responsibilities.”

I think of this phrase often. In fact, my kids have become familiar with “P & R” as the standard of what is expected of them. They have Grandpa to thank for that.

Here’s how it works: when you show that you are responsible, then you earn privileges. It’s that simple. And, although the word “privileges” comes first when we speak that phrase, demonstrating responsibility must always precede earning privileges. If it doesn’t, bad things happen.

Unfortunately, we now live in a society that rewards bad behavior and irresponsibility. Kids (and adults) get away with murder. Why? Because there are rarely any REAL consequences to negative and harmful behavior. Andy Stanley, Senior Pastor at NorthPoint Community Church, coined perhaps the best phrase to explain this phenomenon: What’s rewarded is repeated.
What Stanley means is this: when someone hurts someone else, or does damage to something, or is just outright mean, but is never disciplined for this behavior, that very behavior continues. NOT punishing the individual is actually rewarding the behavior.

I think about the destructive attitude of self-entitlement that so many people carry with them, and how it reinforces this endless cycle. It’s a “do it first, ask questions later” mentality. There’s no honor in it. The privilege has not been earned, but is taken anyway.
Perhaps someone decides to borrow a tent without asking permission from someone. They take the tent, use it, and return it. But, the tent top wasn’t cleaned. The stakes and tie-downs are misplaced. There’s sand and dirt everywhere inside the bag. All the person thinks is, “I borrowed the tent and returned it. See – no big deal.” But, the next time the owner of the tent gets it out, it’s a mess. And, now he or she has to clean it up.

Maybe you ask to drive your friend’s van or truck because you need to load something, and your Prius won’t cut it. You pick up the load of stuff, then unload and return the vehicle. But, it never occurs to you to check the backseat and cargo areas. There’s soot and debris in the floorboards. And, you neglected to see the candy bar wrapper and empty Styrofoam cup you left in the front. Not to mention the three gallons of gas you used on your trip. Will the owner be as willing to help you in the future?

This all may sound nit-picky, but it’s a big deal. And, it’s cyclical: what goes around comes around. You reap what you sow. The Golden Rule. All those clichés and sayings are so true when it comes to how our actions and behaviors either come back to either haunt us or to repay us later.

And, guess what they all come back to? That’s right – Privileges and Responsibilities. When we can speak to people with honor and respect, can treat others’ possessions as our own, and demonstrate that we are trustworthy, we will earn rewards and privileges as a result.

But, if we fail to show responsibility on the front end, and we try to take privileges before we’ve earned them, we dig ourselves a huge hole. And, that is when the responsibilities really begin to pile up, and there’s a long way to go before trust can be gained.

Just put first things first – responsibility and respect – and see how everything can begin to fall into place, and how eager people will be to find ways to return the favor.