Tuesday, October 30, 2007
The 2sday 10
Top 10 Worst Halloween Treats
Disclaimer: straight from the above web site - I didn't write these, but thought they were funny.
1. Apples. Not only do parents freak out about razorblades, kids can get apples any time they want! Parents give kids apples in their lunch boxes every day! Apples are a lame treat, even if you do cover them in caramel.
2. Bible verses. In my hometown, this always served the self-righteous pontiff with at least two cartons of Grade A Farm Fresh.
3. Chocolate-covered peanuts. These almost never taste good unless you buy a really good brand. Besides, Halloween can mean a lot of sweaty running around, and those things will melt everywhere.
4. Cookies you baked yourself. Might as well pre-crumble them before handing them out, because they are done for once they get tossed in the sack. Plus, baking cookies en masse means uneven baking and burned bits. Yuck.
5. Those caramels wrapped in orange wax paper. Does ANYBODY like those?
6. Dried fruit of any kind. You're not making a pity visit to the rest home. Dried fruit is an instant TP'ing.
7. Coupons. Probably the most disappointing thing ever to get in your plastic pumpkin.
8. Novelty Halloween candy wrapped in foil. This stuff tastes like wax. It may cost 20c per truckload but you'll be paying more to clean off the front of your house.
9. Mints. Unless there's some kind of chocolate on that mint, you're in big trouble. Kids hate mints because they remind them of toothpaste. If you MUST freshen their breath, try Andes mints or Peppermint Patties.
10. Popcorn balls. Stale, tasteless and crappy.